I have a thought about those positions of the assembly point that pertain to the “norm” of the society. The common thinking is that there is one. I think it is not. I think there is a set of positions close to each other that form a sort of an “area” accepted and reinforced by the society.
When I meet someone and start an interaction, that person tries to reinforce his position of the assembly point in me, so that perhaps we have a better understanding. That is, I think, a natural mechanism. That is, natural to this particular organization of this particular society. Anyway, I can also reinforce my position of the assembly point and force it onto the other. Some positions are more easily forced than others.
What happens when two people live together is that they have to agree on a common position of the assembly point. Otherwise they would have to oscillate all the time between their own and that of the partner. Or keep their own and forget about deep bonds. Unproductive. So, they have a choice of agreeing on following either of the partner’s position or picking a totally new position for both. If they are lucky they both will feel comfortable with this common position and then they accept it and reinforce it. The position becomes solidified and it is much easier to keep it when there are two of you. Or more, counting the kids.
Any person with half a brain should come to this selection of the position of the assembly point as to the single most important decision in his life. This is the decision that will govern his life from that moment on. The position of the assembly point is the state of your consciousness, the state of your mind, and that results in the tasks, targets, restrictions that you set for yourself. With one swipe of the pen you sign a contract with yourself and your partner that will govern the rest of your life. This decision has to be taken very seriously and certainly with some critical analysis and meditation. And the partner must follow.